Captured memories

I'll never find someone like you. I promise it's true

2011-12-09T01:12:00.003+08:00

Girl you take my breath away, And when I'm with someone new,
I'd rather be here with you :(
My heart belongs to you cause I think about you all the time.
I know my love is true ...when we're together.

When I looked up, you were saying goodbye ,
I'm begging you please . I need you so bad .
Don't leave me now, you're the best that I've had !
All I have is just my heart , and my feelings I give to you
That's all that I can do . Give you forever!
Girl, I'm afraid just to give it up now:(
My heart's telling me to hold back on my vow.
But when you get close, I just want you to know ..
I start to get weak and I honestly can't let you go .

Being considerate, you're warmed my heart.

2011-12-07T22:11:00.003+08:00

You must love when it is given and cherish and protect it with everything you have. All to often we spend so much time looking at the faults and neglect what really matters. Loving someone is loving them more than you love yourself. To give without being asked and to forgive each day and start fresh. It's laughing more than arguing and not taking for granted the little things and moments that you are given with someone. Love does only come around once in awhile. Do treasure it. Or you'll live to regret..

When I see your smile, and I know it’s not for me, that’s when I’ll miss you.

2011-12-01T00:05:00.002+08:00

Nothing hurts more then waiting since I don’t even know what I’m waiting for anymore,
The smile on your face makes me feel so depress, because..because that smile wasn't make out from words i said.

I wish only happiness to her, for it makes me happy.

2011-11-25T01:13:00.003+08:00

As I am writing this now I am more and more accepting the fact that you just don’t care about me. The illusions has worn off. And I have now little hope that you would ever care. After we broke up I would keep myself awake at night crying and sobbing. I would think , One day she’ll come up to me and say ..I still think about you. I had hope that you might care. But I was letting myself fall for that illusion again, stupid me:(

I kept thinking that this loneliness, this sadness, this.. emptiness would be gone if I kept you by my side. But now, I realize that even though something is near you.. they feel.. distant. Was it because I was forcing them to continue staying by my side? Was it because.. because you don't feel the way I wanted you too. Was it because.. was it because I was too selfish to realize what you truly felt? Was it because.. I was always focusing on my feelings, that I didn't even have the time to consider what YOU felt? Or was it because.. you saw right through me?

I thought that this love was our destiny. I thought that you would always stay by my side because, I felt something connect between us when we first met.. All I ever wanted for us to be happy, but I guess things wasn't like the way it was before.

I just wanted to say.. that even after all we've been through, you thought me something special. Even though our love didn't last, I truly realized how it felt like to have a true love.

I'm not finished loving you.

2011-11-22T13:12:00.004+08:00

While trying to cope with the overwhelming emotions of a break up it often occurs to us that staying friends with the ex would at least bring some relief and hope. Unfortunately this path is like swimming in shark infested waters, fraught with danger and if you not careful you will end up drowning or getting eaten alive.

I'm writing all this because I'm confused and I need help! I don't know what is supposed to happen now. Should I just let go for a while or am I expecting too much too soon. We're doing better but we still can't bring up issues without almost arguing. What does one do after they separate? I don't want us to grow apart and it's over just like that because we are not talking but at the same time it hurts to just act like we're on vacation for a while and laugh and joke. This has affected me emotionally and I guess I'm just trying to figure out where all this is headed so the pain can be over if that makes sense.

You may never know how important you are to me or how much I care for you, but you are and you will always be. Bear in mind that I couldn't afford to lose someone I've learned to care about so much.

Breaking up is just like having the worst nightmare after having the best dream.

2011-11-20T23:42:00.005+08:00

I have loved to the point of madness, That which is called madness.

Love isn't all smiles and laughs for the moment, but crying and fighting for
what you believe is right and will last forever.

For everything you have missed, you have gained something else,
and for everything you gain, you lose something else.

There are only three things to be done with a woman.
You can love her,
suffer for her,
or turn her into literature.

Missing you is like being lost in a black and white world. I'm in great pain now:(
Everything seems so faded and lonely.

Believe me..
I can't help but love you,
and if I said too much, sorry, but I don't
regret a single word.

Knowing that she's so happy right now..I'm really jealous. I really am!:(

But I held back so it wouldn't spoil what should be the happiest time in her life. I tried to have fun with my friends everytime i'm outside. But it was killing me inside knowing that she's being so happy with another person. I tried to appear to be happy to cover up the sadness and tears inside me.

Just some words i wanna share with you all.. after all that happen to me.

Many people breakup because they quarrel too much. Try to control your emotions and actions more. Yes, it is hard, but you do have self control. Let your partner win the fight sometimes, just to find the peace. Think before you speak. Don’t let her frustrated or anger you so much, try to maintain a peaceful state of mind. Don’t complain about her. Look for the good things that she does. Most women display their love through their actions, not words. So watch what she does with a loving eye. Try to have a more peaceful loving mind. Think loving happy thoughts, not bad ones. Turn that sad love story into a happily ever after.

My is still not a happily ever after,

When I first fall in love with her, I think the two of us will be together forever. I know in my heart that I'm suppose to be with her. I know that I will have a happy ever after, but then what happens? My heart breaks as I watch the wonderful relationship get worse and worse. I watch as my love story crumples into a terribly sad love story. It's really heartbreaking. It really is! D:

I miss you so much I’d rather die.
I don’t know what to do, I just can’t lie.

I really want to hug you and kiss you right now.

I really wish I can do it somehow..

I hope you feel that I really love you.
I wish you love me that much too:(

I’m sorry for the times I’ve hurt you.
But no matter what, I’ll always adore you.

You’ve the sweetest face and the cutest smile.
Nothing can be compared to you, even you’re far a mile.

No matter where you goes, I'll always be waiting for you.

My Tips..

Trust your lover more. Tell your partner how you feel. When you hold things back, they may not trust you and it also means that you do not trust them. If you don’t have trust in a relationship, then it will fail. Open your heart all the way, don’t hold anything back.

I'm hurting so bad inside, I wish you could see.

2011-11-19T00:33:00.002+08:00

To the person I considered my soulmate,
when you came into my life,
I told myself I would love you
and never gonna hurt you..

You were my bestfriend,
my love, my everything.

Till one day, you showed me that
you're sick, you're afraid you can't stay with me any longer.

I refuse to believe you at first,
but when I saw those tears fell down your cheeks,
It speels out the truth about
how you really feel inside.

You were deeply hurt,
ya, I know..
I was hurt too.

You can't even look straight into my eyes when you said, It was too late!

My life has changed at that very moment.
I just found myself on bended knees
yelling. why?!

I was down completely.
But I had to be strong for you,
At your worst, I was there.

I know you're happy now
wherever you are.
and me, here I am..
hurting.. broken:(

The sadness of the night brings back the days we had,
The time you let go of me,
and the moment that I surrendered you..

Even silence reminds me of all the sorrow.
The pain...
and my hopelessness...

Hear me say this one last time...
I have found the essence of my life,
I have discovered a world that's beautiful
because of you.

For all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these, It might have been.

2011-11-18T01:47:00.003+08:00

It will never get any easier for me, every little thing reminds me of her, I keep telling myself to get over her, and to go on with my life, but how can I go on, when the one person I want to go on with is gone?

And how can I ever go on, when all I ever wanted to do was to tell her that I loved her more than anything on this earth? I never got the chance to say those three little words, words that many people take for granted. But I now know that those three little words will always be words I will NEVER take for granted again! I doubt that I will ever find happiness again, it was a once in a lifetime chance and I have to learn to deal with my mistakes.

But this is what I mean by "you never know what you have until its gone" she’s gone, and I will forever miss her, I only wish she knew this, I only wish she knew, that I still love her more than ever, and that I always will! I only wish that I could go back in time and change everything to make it better, to make it right! But I know I am only living in a dream, it will never happen. But I am only human, I can only wish.. Right? Hais I really wants her back:(

2011-11-14T09:59:00.004+08:00

I lost the battle:( I really wanted to hold on tight to you, But i don't wanna be selfish to you.
I put up a smile and pretend that i can take it. Deep down it hurts to see you walk away.

That One Special Girl.

2011-11-12T17:26:00.002+08:00

There's always that one girl that you will never forget. The one girl that will have your heart forever. That one girl that could make you smile on the worst of days and make you fall in love with her all over again.

The hardest part of remembering her is knowing she isn't there anymore. That she is gone. And that it was your own fault..

She's everything you could dream of and more. She's the definition of perfect in your eyes. Nobody sees her like
you do. Nobody knows her like you do.

She's the prize possession that you couldn't even imagine how lucky you are to be with. To call her your girl. The girl you are going to miss every day for the rest of your life. The one that is worth every tear you cry and every hard time you go through.

Never let that girl slip away no matter what the circumstances. It's not worth the pain and emptiness you will feel after.

Love her every day and cherish every moment you
spend with her. If she is the girl you can't imagine being without then don't mess that up. Because no other girl will ever make you feel that way she does.

I lost my babe, The pain is really killing me.

To my precious girl..

Our relationship has changed a lot over time. We're no longer so similar in personalities, nor do we have as many close moments. In some ways, we know each other backwards and forwards, in others, we quickly realize we have no idea what we're doing. And I'm sorry for that.
I guess what I'm really trying to say is that I do love you. No matter what I say or how I act, I love you. I'm sorry I get jealous and insecure most of the time, but losing you scares me more than anything else in the world.

I really hope we'll be cool as soon as possible. I swear i'll hold on tight to you and never let you feel a hurt ever again. I Love you babe.

Never ever treat your dream girl badly. You'll regret eventually.

2011-10-15T04:33:00.005+08:00

I don’t have a good answer for all the things I've done, but I’m sorry. I know that sorry will never be good enough for all the pain and despair I’ve caused you, and it will never be. I can never forgive myself for what I've done, nor do I expect you to. I just want you to know that you’ve touched my life and changed me for the better.
Ever since I’ve come to know you, I have felt this indescribable feeling only I share with you. It seems like everytime I close my eyes, every time I breathe, I think of you:( I never knew how dead I was until I met you. You’ve opened my eyes to what this world holds girl. Until then I never realized how blue the sky really is. Hais.. I guess what I’m trying to say is that you’ve saved my life in more ways I'll ever know, You’ve taught me everything. About life, hope and the long journey ahead. I’ll always miss you, but I know that what we had will never be forgotten but remember forever and ever. You have come into my life at a time when I needed you the most girl. We talked about so many things that I started to realize my heart and my soul could actually feel something other than hurt. You placed comfort whenn there was fear, confidence when there was doubt, Concern when i wasn't feeling quite well, this may be the past. But i didnt forget the things that you've done for me. I wanted to hold onto to this so badly that I did whatever it took for you to notice. What I didn't realize was that I could lose my entire being, all of who I was and all that I had placed in you. I wanted to be the one who would be there when you needed to talk, I wanted to be the comfort for your soul when the world was too much to handle. I wanted to be strong for you when everything else seemed impossible. I wanted to love you in only the way you deserved to be loved, never realizing that I was destroying myself and you:( Somehow I needed you to be a part of my life. Please will you give me a chance to show you the old me? The old me who could jeopardize anything just for you? No Shouting, No yelling at you. I regretted! Strongly Regretted...

Late at night when all the world is sleeping, I stay up and think of you.

2011-06-22T02:34:00.002+08:00

Sometimes I lay awake at night and wonder Just where did I go wrong? Then a voice comes to me and says, this is going to take more then one night.

I just wish I could roll back the clocks to when things were the same... then we were all just a bunch of crazy teenagers looking for a wild time. But now, thing aren't the same. Each of us have gone our different ways. We change, people change, things just change, and we aren't those crazy teenagers looking for a wild time anymore. We're teenagers looking for a person to love and a person to hug when we're in need.

Chances are so hard to come by and the second one is like, impossible to find?

2011-06-18T23:54:00.004+08:00

It has been months, things aint changing and you're still not by my side..
Hais, i too think that i'm not myself anymore, yeah..i dont talk to you in this manner last time.. true enough, i dont scold you at all. I'm sorry man, It's getting out of hand but i promise you, i will change for the better alright? I <3 you my dear, with all my heart. This will never change(:

It's hard to accept, but you can't change the past. You can't go back and manipulate things to the way you wanted them to happen. Because life is to be meaningless and boring and just not worth living. But you can change the future and that's a beautiful thing about it(: Yes, I will make mistakes. And yes, you will have bad days , but as long as you let the past go, you'll have such a gorgeous and and beautiful time ahead of you. Trust me my dear, I wont hurt you. i love you! And thats my finally say<3

Frustrated because I can't tell if it's real. Mad because I don't know how you feel. Upset because we can't make it right. Sad because I need you day and night. Angry because you won't take my hand. Aggravated because you don't understand. Disappointed because we can't be together, but still I'll love you forever my precious Alvina<3!

The day's are so lonely the night are so long

2011-06-06T19:30:00.004+08:00

Take a look at what you have. Think of all you did to get it. Remember it only takes one second to lose everything.

It could have been a happy day for me today, But guess what? I gotta spent it all alone:(

When I look back and think of this date for the past happy month,
Memories of you make me feel the pain again,
I remember all the moment that we used to share,
And I become aware that one day, I may never see you again:(
Cause you left me D:

Where's my 1year 3month text from you?
My heart is aching badly

Lets just pretend i know nothing at all

2011-06-05T12:52:00.002+08:00

Even though i keep quiet, doesn't mean i don't know whats going on and how much things you've change. Freaking hurts me seeing you like this!

I love you and no one can ever take that away

2011-06-04T11:15:00.002+08:00

Girls like you are hard to find, but i'm very glad i did. It feels like i've known you forever, I think i knew from the start i fall in love with you but that still didn't stop it. I love you more than you will ever know. I would do anything for you, I'm in love with you and nothing could make me stop loving you, I'm always thinking of you, even in my sleep, you're on my mind:( YOU TRULY MEAN THE WORLD TO ME! I Would stay awake just to watch you sleep, There's no word to describe how much i feel about you. I dont care if you think i could do better, because i WANT you! I know forever implies many things and is a long time, but i mean each one of those things and that time i'm willing to spend. You know what? I love girls before, But never have i been so deeply in love, not untill we got together. I'm being frank, Just the thought of hurting you hurts me.

If i was stranded on an island for a year and i could only take one thing, of course it would be you. I only have one question, WHY CAN'T IT BE FOREVER?

I wanna end this nightmare.

2011-05-31T23:36:00.002+08:00

If one day you're crying, call me. I don’t promise to make you laugh but I can cry with you. But if one day you call and there’s no answer, come and see me.. perhaps it’s me who need you:( And honestly, i really do need you.

Never say goodbye when you still want to try.. never give up when you still feel you can take it.. never say you don’t love that person anymore when you can’t let go.

I Don't wanna be jealous because of all this stuff too, But...I just can't help it. I really need you badly D:
No matter how tough the world my seem, I still wish you the sweetest dreams. Goodnight precious.

Her mysterious,fascinating face is so lovable!

2011-05-28T02:24:00.003+08:00

No more laughing moments with you,No more joke time with you..but you know what?? every second, every hour of everyday..you are on my mind! I'm always thinking of you. Thinking if you ever think of me too..but i know you don't and you won't:( You don't have any clue about my real feelings for you, maybe I'll just keep this on my heart and will be contented on just having to see you everyday . This is really hard for me. But i know that this is for the best even if i am silently breaking into pieces! :(

I’m sorry for all the wrong that I’ve done

I’m sorry for the hurt that I've caused

I’m sorry for every tear you’ve shed

I’m sorry I was wrong

I’m sorry for every quarrel

I’m sorry for the giving you sleepless nights

I’m sorry that I failed

I’m sorry I’ve made you sad

I’m sorry I haven’t been there

I’m sorry for being immature

I’m sorry for being selfish

I’m sorry for not making you feel loved

I’m sorry for making you feel forgotten

I’m sorry for not being there emotionally

I’m sorry for not making you feel needed

I’m sorry for not being the guyI know I can be

I’m sorry for not being the lover I used to be

I’m sorry for not being the cuddler I once was

I’m sorry for everything

I feel like a disgrace

I Love You

Why did you change?

I thought we're forever but now we're nowhere,

Can i wish for the time to stop?

and return to the times that we're still in love,

Like we used to.....

To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.

2011-05-17T18:27:00.006+08:00

Is the word "love" important?
I don't know but for me, you are more important.
Do you know why?
Because how can I say "I love you" if you're not here?

Still remember i asked you this before? "why do you love him so much?" you told me, "because we've been together for so long", I got annoyed because you're numb, you didn't even think that the time you were together, it took me longer to have waited for you! It's the past already, I know. I should'nt mention it. But i just wanna tell you i had not forgotten every single thing we've gone through. I want to be with you forever, That's how much i loved you!

No matter how many times I get hurt because of you, I won't leave you. Because even if I have a hundred reasons to leave you, I'll look for that one reason to fight for you.

An angel asked me "why are you sad?", thinking of you I answered "because I miss her"? then I heard the angel giggle..I looked up and began to smile and said ohh, it's you! But guess what, It's just a dream afterall D:

They said that if you are unable to sleep, it's because there's someone thinking about you..surely that person misses you. That's why if you can't sleep, sorry, I can't help it.

I'm going to book in soon, Lets just pray that you'll call me later on uhh.

I got a friend who say this to me, loving someone is tiring, sometimes happy, sometimes you'll cry!
They said I'll have enough someday.
I said to them, that is not true, you know why? "when does ever a person had enough if his love is true? He turn speechless..for godsake! I never felt tired loving her, I'm always happy seeing her, I cried because i love her! It's all about her? So why would i have enough someday?

Please recover!:((

2011-05-14T04:07:00.001+08:00

If only I could be there to takecare of you now, I feel so helpless seeing you so unwell and can't be the special one there to takecare of you like I always did in the past. I wanna be the one to be there for you again whenever you need me my girl:( I really do!

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2011-05-09T16:19:00.001+08:00

╔══╗
╚╗╔╝
╔╝(¯`v´¯)
╚══`.¸.Alvina

If you're going to get any joy out of being depressed, you've got to stand like this.

2011-05-02T05:11:00.004+08:00

How i wish i could be on time to cover my ears with my palms whenever you're gonna say something which i dont really wish to hear, things that make my heart ache so badly :C
I'm gonna be back in that junk place tomorrow D: i guess it will be a sadden-ing week again:(
Still remembered what she told me when i was in camp, I couldn't understand what I felt that moment, but one thing I was sure though... I could not go on a day without a single word from her, I'd become used to having her, even though we doesnt met often nowadays. But truly, she already occupied a space, a large one, in fact in my life.

I Still kept the message i wanted to sent to her when i was in camp, but my mind holded me back, Saying, I dont see a point for you to message her when you obvious know that you wont be expecting anything back. It's sad thinking about all this stuff, its devastating:(

For me being depressed means you can spend all day in bed, and still not get a good night rest.

It is at times like this that I know
what my purpose is in life.
I am here to love you,
to hold you in my arms, to protect you.
I am here to learn from you
and hoping to receive your love in return.
I am here because there is no other place to be.

Every time i feel like i've finally built up my walls they come crashing right back down!:(

2011-05-01T00:35:00.002+08:00

That is one reason why one get jealous easily! Fcuk that jerk! D:

I say things that I don't mean when I'm happy and I say things that shouldn't be said when I'm sad, when can I say things that are worth saying??

2011-04-29T23:40:00.001+08:00

You make my world go round.

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Open My Eyes-Buckcherry Lyrics

2011-04-23T11:44:00.000+08:00

Buckcherry Dont Go Away

2011-04-23T03:36:00.000+08:00

She laughed as easily as she cried. I liked her as she was.

2011-04-23T03:01:00.005+08:00

Inconsistency confuses me. Here was one very likable girl, so warm and passionate, who could turn cold in a heartbeat:(
A touch of jealous was cute, at first. I thought it was sort of flattering that she didn't want to lose me. Alright, I can understand. Given the opposite, I wonder too, For awhile, there were legal reasons for her to think that way, i dont blame her either, thing is, I had nothing to hide.
It's already the past, and furthermore, i did nothing with that ****** ! Honestly, i dont lie when it come's to this type of things, I'm Clean.

I know it's hard to forget things that happen in the past, And i'm in the wrong too. but i've confident i can overcome it with her. dont push me aside, i wanna be there for her. it hurts so badly to see her bursting out tears like that. My Heart Aches:(

I still love her dearly. I pray she knows just how truly sorry I am for my part in what happened to us. Forgiveness is such an easing thing to do..

I'm jealous over what happen just now too:( But i can do nothing but to try and stop thinking about it..

Those arguments! They were over the bitch-est of things sometimes:(

It really hurts when you expected so much more from the person you once loved so much.

2011-04-02T14:29:00.006+08:00

I wish you could look at me and see the person you once loved instead of the person you have grown to hate.

The times we were happy together are worth the times I cry alone

2011-03-12T00:02:00.008+08:00

Let’s see where should I start? Should I start with "her" ? Well, I do admit I have my standards and so should you.. It goes along with not settling. However, I have also just had some really bad luck, but I will not give up. All it takes is some determination and a little luck.. again as with anything else. Hope everything will goes on fine on the day i had told her ya,I realise how the split had brought me to my senses. Behind the message, my aim was to get her to return my sms. I was fairly taken aback when she returned my sms within 24 hours..

God! Please do me a favour! Whenever i'm not with her! Please! Do look down and bless her for me? It's kind of heartbreaking to not know what she's doing and stuff:(

Keiko the killer whale

2010-06-01T17:06:00.003+08:00

STOP YOU NONSENCE! ILOVEYOU! RAWRS!:D

2010-06-01T00:13:00.002+08:00

I hope you know I still care
still miss your voice
still feel your touch
still love your being

Trust me I'll always keep you
in one special sacred place.
Always my dear!

We need trust and love to sustain the deepest parts of us.

2010-05-17T03:33:00.004+08:00

I needs help navigating the ocean of love. Its so exhilarating, but it can also be tricky and disheartening. There i am.. sailing along, feeling like the surface of the water is as smooth as glass, when all of a sudden my lover says something that causes something to bubble up from from the dark, murky depths below. Maybe it's fear, maybe it's an unresolved issue or trauma, perhaps it's simply a lack of trust.. What to do?:(

It's so boring.

2010-05-03T05:49:00.002+08:00

Hey Baby and fellow Reader's(:
I'm back posting. Hahaas
I'm so bored right now. ARGHH!
Ok guys. For some of you who know.
I love marine animals. YEAH! Their so cool and adorable right? LMAO!
Take a look at some wedsite i love to go(:
http://theshadowlands.net/serpent.htm#nova

http://advocacy.britannica.com/blog/advocacy/2009/02/islands-marine-sanctuaries-and-the-struggle-against-extinction/

http://marinebio.org/Oceans/Creatures.asp

Alright. I'm just listing afew to show you guys, Course i'm so bored that i've got nothing else to do D:

I guess my baby is awake preparing for school by now. 3more days and it's our 2nd Month Anni(:
I'm so happy to have you by my side baby:D Without regret! Iloveyou!

Nessie.

2010-05-03T05:37:00.006+08:00

The Loch Ness "monster" -- affectionately known as "Nessie" -- is an alleged plesiosaur-like creature living in Loch Ness, a long, deep lake near Inverness, Scotland. Many sightings of the "monster" have been recorded, going back at least as far as St. Columba, the Irish monk who converted most of Scotland to Christianity in the 6th century. Columba apparently converted Nessie, too; for it is said that until he went out on the waters and soothed the beast, she had been a murderess.

The modern legend of Nessie begins in 1934 with Dr. Robert Kenneth Wilson, a London physician, who allegedly photographed a plesiosaur-like beast with a long neck emerging out of the murky waters. That photo created quite a fuss. Before the photo, Loch Ness was the stuff of legend and myth. The locals knew the ancient history of the sea serpent. But people came to the lake more to relax than to go on expeditions looking for mythical beasts. After the photo, the scientific experts were called in. First, they examined the photo itself. Could be a plesiosaur. Yes, but it could be a tree trunk, too. Or an otter. Later, there would be explorations by a submarine with high tech sensing devices. Today, we have a full-blown tourist industry said to have generated an estimated $37 million in 1993, complete with submarine rides (about one hundred bucks an hour in 1994) and a multi-media tourist center. Unfortunately, business has slowed down in recent years. In 2007, it was estimated that Nessie tourism brought in an estimated £6 million ($12.2 million) to the Highlands. Some are blaming skepticism and the fact that there have been only two sightings in the first nine months of 2007. There were only three sightings in 2006. A decade ago, ten to twenty sightings a year was common.* The decline in sightings should concern the true believers, given the ubiquity of digital cameras, camera-phones, and the presence of webcams at various places around the lake. Adrian Shine, head of the Loch Ness Project, believes that one reason for the decline in sightings is that people are more skeptical about what they see. “I think we live in a more pragmatic age, and that people are becoming more aware of the sort of illusions that can occur on water,” he said.* If so, there may be hope for our species, after all.

There have been other photographs of Nessie, as well. The tabloids will pay good money for a photo of Nessie, and some enterprising souls have camped out for years in hopes of capturing the elusive beast on film. One good photo and they can retire for life! The Smithsonian even has a WWW page on Nessie, where it advocates continued scientific investigation into the matter. According to the Smithsonian,

Even though most scientists believe the likelihood of a monster is small, they keep an open mind as scientists should and wait for concrete proof in the form of skeletal evidence or the actual capture of such a creature.

We suggest...that those individuals interested in such a phenomenon...join the International Society of Cryptozoology, a scientific organization that critically looks at issues involving unknown creatures of unexpected form and size, and subjects them to technical review.

Keep on looking! Of course, this is the same Smithsonian which, in the January 1996 issue of its monthly magazine, ran a highly uncritical article on dowsing. We have come to expect the disingenuous defense of open-mindedness from the tabloids as they exploit our love of mystery and wonder, but we thought the Smithsonian would take a higher road and present empirical studies instead of uncritical wishful thinking. It may be the case that the Smithsonian has found that in order to compete and survive it must cater to the tabloid mentality of the general public and elected officials. What's next? Bigfoot T-shirts as part of their annual membership drive?

sightings and testimonials

In addition to the photographs of Nessie, there have been numerous sightings reported in the testimonials of unquestionably reliable witnesses. How could anyone look at all this "evidence" and dismiss Nessie as a figment of people's imagination, as just another case of pareidolia (another Virgin Mary in the tortilla)? Easy. Let's start with the photographs.

In a story not nearly as fascinating or obscure as the Piltdown hoax, but at least on par with the faked fairy photos that gulled Arthur Conan Doyle, the most famous photo of Nessie as a relative of the long-extinct plesiosaurs was reported to have been faked. David Martin, a zoologist, and Alastair Boyd were members of a scientific project to find Nessie. They are credited by the London Sunday Telegraph [March, 12, 1994] as having dug up the story of the faked photo, which was staged using a toy submarine. Christian Spurling, who died in the fall of 1993, was said to have made a deathbed confession of his role in the prank. The fake photo was not taken by Wilson--his name was used to give the photo stature and integrity--but by Spurling's stepbrother, Ian Wetherell. Ian's father, Marmaduke ("Duke") Wetherell, had been hired by the London Daily Mail to find the monster. Wetherell was a filmmaker who described himself as a "big game hunter." What bigger game could there be than Nessie? Except that the big game was actually a small model of a sea serpent made of plastic wood attached to a 14-inch toy submarine! Actually, the game did get big as the little prank created such a huge fuss that the pranksters decided that the best thing for them to do would be to keep quiet.

Alastair Boyd, mentioned above as one of the researchers who uncovered the photo hoax, claims he made a genuine sighting of Nessie in 1979. His Nessie didn't look like a dinosaur, though. More like a whale, he said. It was at least 20 feet long and he says he saw it roll around in the water. Now, it's not likely that there are any 20-foot otters, but there are 20-foot logs. There are also errors in guessing at the size of things seen in the distance for a few seconds under less than ideal conditions. No matter, Boyd is convinced there are 20-foot long creatures in the loch. One would think they'd be hard to miss.

Whatever Nessie turns out to be, it is very unlikely that she is a plesiosaur. That marine reptile lived about 160 million years ago and has been extinct for 65 million years. Furthermore, Leslie Noè of the Sedgwick Museum in Cambridge, UK, who has studied fossils of the long-necked creature, says that "the osteology of the neck makes it absolutely certain that the plesiosaur could not lift its head up swan-like out of the water," which is how Nessie has been described. Noè thinks that the plesiosaur used its long neck to feed on soft-bodied animals living on the sea floor.*

Is it a fish, a wake, a wave?

Since the Loch Ness monster story has been around for more than 1500 years, if there is a monster it is not likely that it is the same monster seen by St. Columba. Or, are we to believe that not only is Nessie very big, she is very old as well, a veritable Methuselah among beasts? In short, there must be more than one monster. I'll leave it to the zoologists to calculate how many monsters are necessary to maintain the species over the years. One report I read claimed that a minimum population of ten creatures would be needed to sustain the population. The same report claims that Loch Ness is incapable of sustaining a predator weighing more than about 300 kg (about 660 pounds) [The Naturalist, winter 1993/94, reported in The Daily Telegraph]. Adrian Shine once said the monster could be a Baltic sturgeon, a primitive fish with a snout and spines (actually ridges of horn-like skin) which can grow up to nine feet long and weigh in at around 450 pounds (actually they can grow much longer and weigh much more than 450 lbs.). This may sound like just another fish story to some, but there is scientific evidence that Nessie is, at best, a big fish in a big lake, or a big wake in a big lake. Shine, who has been studying the Loch Ness story for some twenty-five years, now thinks that what people see when they think they see the "monster" is actually an underwater wave. A similar view has been presented by Luigi Piccardi, an Italian geologist "who is convinced that seismic rumblings far below the famous Scottish lake cause the roiling waves, deep groans and explosive blasts that have for centuries led people to believe that a giant beast lurks below the loch's murky surface ("Mystery unlocked? A scientist says he's solved a monster controversy -- the 'beast' in Loch Ness is merely an illusion created by earthquakes," San Francisco Chronicle, June 27, 2001 by Chuck Squatriglia)."*

some bare bone facts

The Naturalist reported on extensive studies of the lake's ecology that indicate that the lake is capable of supporting no more than 30 metric tons of fish. (The food chain of the lake is driven by bacteria, which break down vegetation, rather than algae like most lakes.) Estimating that a group of predators would weigh no more than 10 percent of the total weight of the fish available for them to consume, researchers arrived at the 300-kg (660-lb.) statistic. It strikes me as extremely odd that with all the sophisticated technology, the submarines, and the thousands of voyeurs that after all these years we still don't have a single specimen. We don't have a carcass; we don't even have a bone to examine. With at least ten of these huge monsters swimming around in the lake at any given time, you'd think that there would be at least one unambiguous sighting by now. You would think so, that is, unless you want to keep the hoax/myth/legend alive. I can't deny that there are good economic reasons for keeping the Loch Ness monster myth alive. It's good for tourism. And there are all those "scientific" investigations to be paid for with government funds and private donations: full employment for cryptozoologists. Then, of course, there is all that film sold to photographers in search of The Big One. But tourism grew out of the myth, not the other way around. This story would be told with or without multi-media centers and gift shops full of Nessie mementos.

Besides the photo which Mr. Boyd and others have exposed as a fake, there are many other photos of Nessie to consider. Not all photos of Nessie are fakes. Some are genuine photos of the lake. These photos are always very gray and grainy, taken of murky waters with lots of shadows and outlines. There is no question that in some of these there does appear to be a form which could be taken for a sea serpent. The form could also be taken for a log, a shadow on a wave, a wave itself, driftwood, or flotsam. Anyone who has traveled around Loch Ness will not be disappointed in the variety of forms which one will see when looking out upon the waters. The lake is very long, and on the day I was there it was very turbulent, even though the day was a rather pleasant one as far as Scottish summer days go. Obviously, since I was there for only one day, I had not come to Loch Ness to do any serious research into the monster. I'll confess that I didn't even bother to stop in Drumnadrochit to take in the Loch Ness Monster Exhibit, which, according to Fodor's guide book to Scotland, "presents the facts and the fakes."

I was on vacation, traveling with my wife, daughter, future son-in-law, and a dear friend. We headed down the B862, which affords intermittent views of the lake from the east side. It was a pleasant drive among moors and conifer spikes, but nothing spectacular in a land of glorious spectacles. The drive northward on the west bank along the A82 takes you right along the lake in many places and past the famous Urquhart castle, a "favorite monster-watching spot" (Fodor's).

Urquhart is on the tourist bus trail and gets more than its share of visitors. I had wanted to stop there and take advantage of its excellent location for monster watching but I couldn't get into the parking lot. I drove north past the castle, looking for a place to turn around, and after many miles finally found one. I drove south, past the castle again, as the parking lot guard waved me on by the castle: the lot was still full. I drove for miles looking for a place to turn around again, finally found one, and made a third pass with the same result. Was it a sign from Nessie? We had to do most of our viewing of Loch Ness from the road. While we didn't see any monsters that day, I still have a vivid memory of one of Scotland's longest (24 miles) and deepest lakes (750, 800, or 900 ft. in places, depending on which source you pick). I have no doubt that anyone who stared across those murky, wavy, shadowy waters would see many things that could be Nessie. I don't doubt that many, if not most, of the thousands of witnesses who testify to having seen Nessie are honest, decent folk who have interpreted their perceptions according to their wishes. They have come to the lakeside and they have been blessed with a visitation! They are truly special and their lives are now marked forever as unique. Best of all: they have a story to tell for the rest of their lives. In many ways they are like the young lady who declared that the highlight of her life was when she saw music icon Michael Jackson being whisked through a department store: "it was like seeing a UFO," she declared! I'll bet she'll be telling the story of her Michael Jackson sighting for years to come. Who knows to what epic proportions the young lady's tale might grow? Perhaps it will grow as big as Loch Ness itself, like the legend of Nessie.

postscript July 31, 2003

The BBC claims it has proved that Nessie the plesiosaur (a marine reptile) does not exist. What they did was use satellite navigation technology to aim 600 separate sonar beams through Loch Ness to ensure that none of the loch was missed and found no trace of the monster. The research team hoped their instruments would pick up the air in Nessie's lungs as it reflected a distorted signal back to the sonar sensors. The only signal they got was from their test buoy moored several meters below the surface.

"We went from shoreline to shoreline, top to bottom on this one, we have covered everything in this loch and we saw no signs of any large living animal in the loch," said Ian Florence, one of the specialists who carried out the survey for the BBC.* The show, called Searching For The Loch Ness Monster, was made for BBC One.

Will this end the belief in Nessie? Don't bet on it.

2010-04-15T04:15:00.005+08:00

Ok great, I'm so duper forgetful nowadays. It's the second time i forgot to pick baby up from school D:
ARGGGGGHHHHHH! She didnt nag or scold me, but i know she's petty upset though she didnt mention anything to me. Sorry baby!

Though there were rough times occassionally. Times when I would be depress over certain issues. I can't exactly say what are the issues, because I don't even know whether they are really big enough to even worth worrying about. But sometimes it can get really frustrating when it keeps appearing at the corner of my mind. I just hope the remaining days of year would be better. It will be. As long as you're by my side my dearest girl(:

That moment changed my life forever(:

2010-03-30T21:56:00.006+08:00

I'm so sorry i broke my promise uh baby.
Was suppose to fetch you from school but i totally forgot about it.
I hope you wont be cursing me behind my back wor. Lols! *Joke* :D
Ok.. Play soccer and basketball the whole day today. Didn't meet my precious girl D:
But we had fun yesterday at Rueben birthday celebration in his condo uh.
Had a short tiff with that dumb baby girl of mine.
But in the end ok le. Just dont know why we wont quarrel for long. Hahaa! TOUCHWOOD! I think after reading this she will come out afew pattern uh. Correct baby? :DD

To everyone whom can't get their love one.Go after that person that you may be deadly infatuated with.. It's not crazy.. it's just striving to get what you want. Even if you are turned down, you would feel better in the long run just knowing that you took a chance.. stayed determined and positive in the process, and that you faced one of your fears. Trust me, it doesnt hurt much(: Go for it!

Our very first pic taken together:D My hair may look ugly. BUT! I still love this pic alot(: WAHAHA! I LOVE YOU BABY!

Dont think that i'm fooling around with you:(

2010-03-26T17:53:00.003+08:00

You're always on my mind,
In my heart,
In my soul, Baby
I want to have you hear me saying..No one needs you more than i do.

You're one of a kind and 24/7 on my mind(:

2010-03-25T06:58:00.006+08:00

So sorry Baby, I can't keep you accompany this whole long week D:
Gotta work so i hope you could understand uh. ohh well. Of course you'll understand right? Hahaa:D
Ok. Something happen today while i was working at Orchard. Went to find shawn and we started slacking together when we're not suppose to. lol. While slacking. A couple was walking to a carpark direction and the guy was like staring at me for a very long time. So i stare at him back till he went in the carpark. 5minute later..He came out riding a super4. AND HE WAS STILL STARING AT ME. But as we're suppose to meet Teo and Kwek to end work. We walked away. Few second later. That guy trotter loudly to show off or something. Guess what i saw when i turn back?
His girlfriend on the ground! LOL! SUPER FUNNY SIA. Want to show off in the end hai his girlfriend fall. ROFL:DD

What a joke sia.. K lah. Seriously dont know what to say when i blog now.
Shall go to sleep(: seeya!
Oya! Btw. I miss my baby badly. Can't wait to meet her later:DD

I Love My Precious Girlfriend ^.^

I love when my heart smiles.. But the best of all.. It smiles because of you:D

2010-03-12T05:33:00.003+08:00

It's been so long. I finally get what i wanted so so so much!
It's you baby. I'm so not gonna let you leave me. Never! :D
6March2010. It's where i really stand on my feet. Because of you(:

Anyway. i finally post again..Wahahaa. It's just a short one. But i just felt like posting. Hahahaas

Because the distance between us is so great..
My arms cannot reach you..
But because my love for you is just as great..
my heart does(:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I still miss my lovely dog cookie D:

I miss you!

2010-02-21T11:46:00.005+08:00

I can't sleep well for the whole night.. Cookie.. I can't accept the fact that you left us so soon! It's just too soon D: And cookie.. Do appear in my dream again. But not in that type of shocking way. Thanks baby!

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable. All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing, they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind. They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His/Her bright eyes are intent. His/Her eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his/her legs carrying him/her faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face, your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart. Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together..

How i wish this story will come true D:

Heres a Tribute i wrote for you cookie.

Cookie,
I dont know how to put into words what I feel right now.. you were one of a kind for sure.. always on the hunt for something to bite to make you feel comfortable.. A short but sweet life is what you lived. I can never explain the joy you brought to our family and the countless times you made us smile. I hope your trip to the rainbow bridge was nice and by now you should be enjoying your new healthy body free of Kidney and liver problem. The pain is finally gone baby! Just know you are loved and we will miss u everyday. There will always be an empty space at the food dish and in our hearts only you could fill. Ohh how we will miss you under our feet it will remind us everyday when we dont treat that your no longer home with us. I hope we brought as much happiness to your life as you have to ours. We love you so much and we will meet again someday. Till then sweet Cookie girl rest in peace our angel D:

R.I.P Cookie. 4th Nov 2006 - 20th Feb 2010

2010-02-20T22:23:00.009+08:00

My Dearest Dog, Cookie:(
I sit and try to write the words i want your heart to hear.
Hoping to find some comfort in the fact that your not here.
I do believe with all my heart that your soul has gone to be
with all the other angel dogs that you were meant to see.
We will have to stay behind.. untill God calls us too.
So do not be afraid that he's only called you.
Untill then, I'll keep trying to see through my tears.
with memories you left us.. to reflect through the years.
And I dread the day will come, when we'll start to see through the pain of the moment and remember just YOU.
Now you go and play, and look down when you can.
Remembering we love you and this is'nt gonna end.
I heard from my sister that the day before cookie was admitted to the vet. That night she went to all of our room. And lie beside all of our bed. each and every single room. Maybe..Just maybe?? she knew that she's gonna leave us D: Hais
She past away today. Saturday, February 20, 2010 at 6am while she was at the vet....
The company you've gave us this years is deeply felt. You'll always be the bumpy and adorable dog we've had. Regrets of not being by your side when you've left. Always with love. Rest in peace my baby!

I'm not gonna let you out of my system so easily this time:DD

2010-02-17T02:50:00.005+08:00

Alright guys. i'm not gonna let my blog rot.
Has been busy lately. Or you could say...LAZY lately. =X Hahaas
Firstly.. Happy Chinese New Year to all of you uhh:DD
Ang bao alot alot ah! Huat ah! lols!
K lah..Back to the topic i wanna tell you guys..
Went to rueben condo to bai nian today..Lost about $20plus uh. Course i gambled =="
I lost alot this year siaa. about 100plus le??
(Info to you all!: Do not gamble! It's a waste of $$ seriously!) =="
Went out with Shawn and co today too:D
Went to CGH with zihao as he was sick uhh. took his Mc and headed to tampines to go bai nian at wanyi house. ohh gosh! i suddenly dont feel like posting out the other few.. Lazy siaa. lols! Anyway.. we had a great time uhh:D I know this post is kind of no link uhh. course i ended the post like this.. hope you all dont mind(:

The most awaited day had come..
And I'm very happy to see you walking back again..
A face full of smile from eyes, nose and lips:DD

You're everything I've grown to miss.

2010-02-06T10:53:00.006+08:00

Went to fetch angie from school with James, Rongfu and Rueben yesterday.
Opps. Rueben wasnt going to fetch angie. he went there to fetch joyce? lols!
Headed to whitesand course angie wanna take mrt home. So James went along with her while the rest of us went to Ehub Nebo to slack..Tammy, Marcus, Edward, Darrel Tang and one guy came after that. Ps uhh. Forget the guy name. lols!
Slacked at nebo for a long time. Walk our way to 418 and played many things soon after we get bored of nebo. Hahaas.
Met Andrew and co in the night and drank a little at 444. Played card game. Hahaha! This part was funny. i went crazy. lols!
Post a paranormal for you all to see(: Kind of short(: and boring?
But i've got nothing to do and lay to find a better stories. so hope you you all wont mind uh(:

Changi Chalet is another well known haunted place in Singapore. The photo above was taken by my Christian friends who do not lie. An unexplainable mist of human shape appeared on film but we didn't see it when taking the photo.

Three of my girlfriends and I booked into a chalet in Changi - this was many years ago and those chalets, the old bungalow types, are not there anymore - and that was when we had the fright of our lives. We aren't superstitious people and since that incident we have tried to explain away what happened, but that night you couldn't blame four teenage girls for being scared to be alone in a chalet in lonely Changi with hardly anyone else around.

I remember that we asked the keeper if the place was haunted, because it looked so creepy from the outside. He never made any reply, making it all the more creepier. It made us a bit more sorry that we hadn't invited any boys along to stay with us - this was supposed to be a sort of pajama party. Anyway, we managed to settle in after a while - no barbecue, we had decided that by consensus, and we were starting to get chatty and beginning to make some noise when one of the girls said she heard the front doorbell ring.

From where we were in the living room we could see the porch outside. There was no one there so we thought she must have been mistaken. She too said, yes, we were right, she must have imagined it. We were chatting away again, chewing the cud, rather loudly I might add, when she said, "There it goes again." This time we were all quiet and looking hard at the porch from where we were. There certainly was no one there. We could see the porch clearly from where we were. If there were anybody out there ringing the doorbell, we should have been able to see the person for sure. So what could she have heard? Then all of us heard it. Loud and clear. It was the doorbell. One of the girls screamed but we quickly hushed her. Then we heard it again, and again and again, each time getting louder and more insistent as if someone was angry and demanding to be let in.

We didn't know what to do. Everybody froze. All our eyes were fixed on the empty porch where the buzzer was. After a little more of the insistent ringing, the bell stopped. Then we heard it. The back door was creaking open. All of us screamed and ran out through the front door. We didn't stop running until we reached the next chalet. We banged on the door, thumping away without caring about anybody, afraid like hell. The man who opened the door was in his pajamas and he looked a bit nervous. All of us pushed past him and stumbled into the living room. There were four other men there, all of them also like the one who had opened the door. They were seated around the table and they clearly had been gambling. "Uncle, uncle," we cried, explaining what had happened and begging to be allowed to stay in this chalet with them for the night. They looked at each other as if they thought we were mad, but finally one of them said, okay, we could stay.

I can tell you, that night we hardly got any sleep. When one of the girls wanted to go to the loo, she forced me to go along and stand guard outside. From where I was, I could hear her singing Amazing Grace to give herself courage while doing her business.

I'm getting bored now. Shall stop here(:

Let me be the one :D

2010-02-03T01:15:00.005+08:00

Omg!
My I.P address tio block in rydahms :(
cannot play le sia!:(
Damn you qianxian! it's all your fault! You gonna get it tomorrow! =="
Went out to 418 today..Slacked for a little while and came home with Qianxian, Wanyi, and James.
All came to my house to play computer together..My mum came back and her face was like...Wow! Seems when my house became a lanshop? Wahahaas.
But she didnt say much uhh..Thanks to that qianxian for hacking in rydahms. Now i can't get to play..Arghh!
So i started searching in youtube for videos to upload.
And here is one.. Hope you all would like it uhh(:

Will things brighten up for me??

2010-01-31T22:42:00.007+08:00

Alright guys!
I'm such a goodboy today:D
Didnt went out for long uhh. Only 2hours?
To eat! Not to slack..Hahahaas.
And i've gotten myself another job(:
Best thing is..James Lee Chee Keong is also working wor..
Unbelieveable uh?! Wahahaas. That No.1 Slacker finally wanna get himself a job.
Will be starting work tomorrow. 12pm till 8pm uh.. Hopefully everything will goes on well (:
Ok..Drop this topic. Now it's Rueben!
What's wrong with you?! Mingming like her still want Bomb here bomb there?
Thought you got alot ideas de? Now what?? Why the hell are you dumping out ideas from your brain?! Have the chance jiu go only lah. Must treasure know! If not sure gone de.
You mark my words. I'm your GOD OF ROMANCES remember?:DDD Hahahaas.
Dont drag le uhh. Kaka chiong nia!(: Try and interact with her asap uh! Lmao.
Dont be like the previous one. Make you cry wor..you've probably suffered from extreme depression at that time uh..Like me la. D: or even worse.. MAJOR REMORSE! Lols! k lah. Enough of this(: All the best to you uh:DD

I better get going before i can't get up for work tomorrow(:
Tatas!

2010-01-28T23:26:00.005+08:00

Went to 444 in the afternoon today. around 3plus?
Sat there till 4 with James Rongfu and kenric..Than headed to 418 and play Bball.. after that some Ass never play finish jiu go le..
Tmd.. Dont like this type of ppl.. Home-ed as there aint anything to do there le.. Use computer till now uhh..

Dumbass.. I didnt had a chance to say goodnight to you today:(
Well.. How about saying it here? Hahaas. Course i dont wanna text and wake you up uhh:D
It's kind of lame.. But i'm bored! So use this to spent some little little time uhh(:
Nightnights Korean kiddo(:

Kill my boredoms!

2010-01-25T22:24:00.003+08:00

Hahaas. Did'nt go to bedok today..
Course James and shawn dont want go. Tmd! Make me so excited sia. lols!
Anyway..slacked at 418 the whole day. So bored know! Can sleep i tell you..hahaas
Was suppose to meet Mantou course she wanna drink uhh. But dont feel like going:DD
Bored ah! Kill my boredoms anyone?!

ANYWAY..RUEBEN JIAYO! LOL

2010-01-25T12:00:00.002+08:00

Here is another Scary stories for you.
Remember to read uhh! Dont tell me you're scared again..
Just remember what i told you yesterday uhh(:

Who Has Called Me??

I had two very strange same encounters that till now I still can’t figure it out and find them very weird. These two encounters happened in year 2002 and the second encounter just happened a few months after the first one. Let me relate the incidents once again.

The first encounter had happened a year ago and I still find it freaky. At that time, I was still studying for my diploma. It was just a normal day for me until I received this call from my friend, Max. This is how it started.

In the early afternoon, my friend Max had called ‘me’ to ask me out together with another friend Dom and I agreed. But later on when they tried to call me to state the venue, I didn’t pick up. Shortly after that, ‘I’ called one of them back and suggested meeting them at Bugis instead of Orchard as they were there. So they have no problem with that and said that they would call me once they reached Bugis. Hence, everything was set.

Here comes the weird part. I think is around 2 to 3pm that I received Max’s call and he told me they had reached Bugis and asked me where I am. At first, I was shocked and was trying to figure what he was talking about. Then I just told him I was at home and was preparing to go to school and they were surprised. Anyway, I was told that they actually called the right number from their phonebook but the only thing is that my voice was a bit lower and not much difference in it. Thus, my friends never suspected anything. After telling me what has happened in the last few hours. I explained to them that all along I had been bathing and while I was bathing I couldn’t call them it was impossible. Although I saw the missed calls been displayed it was only until I had dressed up then I called them.

At that moment all of us just kept silence as we don’t know how to express ourselves and I felt goose bumps.

As for the second encounter, it was much similar to the first one and happened only 5 months later. I could still remember that it was a Saturday evening and I was with my friend Geraldine swimming at my house. Both of my friends, Dom and Pauline called me up to go for a drink at the One Fullerton with the other friends as well. Geraldine and I were alright with it so I just told them that we would meet them there at around 9pm.

After swimming, Geraldine and I went for our dinner near my place which is around 7 plus. We were eating halfway through when Pauline called up and asked me where we were. So I jus told them we were still eating and told her that we might be late and told them to order their drinks first. Pauline was puzzled by the things I had said as she told me that Dom and her were at my house at that time. She said that I actually called her and asked if Dom could pick Geraldine and me up as I am not driving. Moreover, the name appeared in the handphone was mine and it was my voice. The moment I heard her saying that, I got a very strange feeling and I told her I didn’t make the call at all. The very last called that I made was the one that I told them where and what time to meet. Anyway, I just told them to go the cafe first and would catch up with them later.

Once we reached there, all of us were just discussing the both encounters again and couldn’t find any logical answer to it. We were all very stunned and felt scary.

I just love to replay the moment we spent together every night i close my eyes..

2010-01-25T09:29:00.007+08:00

Woke up at 8am today. Super early uh?
Thats because i slept early yesterday la dey(:
Guess later should be going bedok to play Bball with James and co bah..
Course we didnt make it yesterday when we were suppose to uhh..Hahahaas
You people must be thinking why do we have to go so far when we could actually play at pasir ris right? Hahaas. Thats because we want to thrash 1 uncle uh. Heard from James and shawn got 1 uncle very haolian when they went bedok to play bball.
So now they need NIGEL help uhh. LOLS! Hope they dont see this. If not sure say i buay bah de ==" Lmao:DDD

Thanks once again for brightening up my day..
Its always you who could do it uhh. I dont understand why too..

Saying I love you is caught in my throat.
And drowning in my feelings D:

2010-01-24T09:36:00.001+08:00

People says that hospitals are the most "unclean" places in the world. I can't disagree with that especially when I personally experience something weird.

After my O'levels I was granted entry to a course in a polytechnic. I decided to take up a job during the 6 months period before I went to polytechnic. A job agency helped me to find a job in New Chxxxx Hospital (now known as Chxxxx General Hospital) material management department. I was to send all kinds of equipments to wards and OTs and offices, be it medical supply or office stationeries.

The Lift

At that time Chxxxx hospital was not officially open yet, only its ER and other ICUs are in operations. One day, I made my round up to the SICU and pass supplies to the ward. I press for the lift and when it came, I pushed my trolley into it and entered it pressed the B2 button for my department. The door closed and suddenly it opened. Thinking that maybe there was someone outside, I peeped out but there was no one there. I pressed the Close button again.....and the same thing happens again!!!! This happened for four times... and this hair rising feeling got to me and I exited the lift. The door closed and it went down!! Geez, I though... maybe something is wrong with the lift sensors... I waited for another lift that did finally came AND bring me down to B2.........but a shock is awaiting me.....

When the door opens at B2 and I push my trolley out of the lift, the lift on the left, which was the left that refused to take me, opens at the same time. What came out of it was totally shocked me. Out came two attendants with a metal coffin (those that hospital use to transfer the dead to the morgue..... did I told u that the morgue was in B2 as while?) and the family of the dead. The family was weeping and crying..... this really chills me to the bone. For the rest of the day I felt sick and morbid.

Was something in the lift awaiting the arrival of the dead? That's why it did not allow me to go down together? .

The Ward

After a month of two, my supervisor decided to send my group of friends and I to Old Toa Paxxx hospital ( Already closed ) at that time to retrieve what ever can be salvage from the old buildings there. The only two humans that were there are 2 security guards... a father and son.

The first day we went there, I had this feeling... that the hospital was covered in a dark aura. The only lift there smells of disinfectant and death.... and it get stuck always in the middle of two storeys. Imagine the door opening and you are half way under ground and from the first floor...... most of the electricity was out or cut off too. The place .. I guess like all abandon buildings looks spooky.

One day, I and another guy was assigned to count the total number of metal bed frames left in the hospital. We decided to count from the main building first, from the top level down. It was around 5pm when we reach the 2nd storey. We open the ward door with our keys and walked in. It was a class C ward.... comprise mainly of different rooms by partitions with no doors in front of the partitions with a long corridor linking every room. We simply looked in and count the number of beds. I was doing the counting and my friend was doing the recording. " Seven beds", "Ok..." " 10 beds..." ," Ok.." then I came to the second last room I peeked in and i just continued to the last ward....."8 Beds" " Ok..... but oie..... the second last one you never count le.... how many beds huh?"

Then It struck me by I never count the beds in that ward. I saw a room... fully furnished. There were mattresses and pillows on each bed with cases and all. Looks like a perfect ward in a hospital. And on the first bed right near the door, was this old man, dressed in hospital grown and sitting on the side of the bed and looking directly at me.........." 8 beds la F**k! Go liao la!! " I pulled my friend along and walked fast out of the ward, not daring to look to my left as I pass the particular room. My friend thought I was lazy and whacked me on my back when I was out of the ward. I told him exactly what happened. He scolded me even more. He later told me that when a person were to see any "unclean" things.. lets not suppose to tell others or his bad luck will pass on to others...... To this day it still sends chills down my spine just to think about it.......

2010-01-24T09:17:00.001+08:00

During the early 1980’s, a father and son were driving along a lonely country road near the Oregon-Washington border. The father would regularly work late at night, while his teenage son worked at a store nearby. As they lived some twenty miles outside of town, quite often the trip home would lead them along an empty, desolate country highway in the late hours when nary another car was seen along the ride home.

On this particular night, as they were driving along the most desolate stretch of road, as they rounded a corner, up ahead of them, in the gleam of their truck’s headlights, they saw what at first appeared to be a small horse standing in the middle of the road.

As the father brought the truck to a slow crawl to avoid hitting the animal, he and his son quickly noted that as the animal drew closer to them, save from its great size, the less the animal began to look like a horse. As they brought the truck to a complete stand-still, they could clearly see that the animal was actually very gaunt, had a long snout and was clearly dog-like with a shaggy, gray colored coat. As the animal crossed the road, it turned its head to look toward the truck. Opposed to having the reflective eyes of other animals that just seem to shine very brightly when blinded by headlights, the huge canine instead displayed a pair of sinister glowing red eyes unlike any the man or his son had ever seen. Almost as quickly as it had appeared from around the corner, the huge red-eyed dog then quickly bounded off the roadside and into the forest.

As the occupants of the truck quickly looked at each other in disbelief, the father quickly gunned the truck’s accelerator and drove away at a high rate of speed. As they passed the spot where the animal had leaped toward the trees, the son turned to look into the forest for one last glimpse of the animal, but the dog was long gone.

Though the two witnesses came to an unspoken agreement to never discuss the matter, the son later remarked that to this day, his father will speed up when he is driving this stretch of lonely road.

What on earth did they see that night; a demon dog or a shared delusion?

On a final note, it should be noted that although the above tale describes a gray coated dog versus a black one, many sightings of the Black Shuck in the United Kingdom also describe huge gray-furred canines with glowing red eyes.

When the British first settled Oregon in the the late 18th century, did the dreaded Black Shuck follow the first settlers half way around the world or is there a giant canine species, still undiscovered by science, prowling the ancient woods of the Pacific Northwest? Your guess is as good as mine.

R.I.P. JIMMY "THE REV" SULLIVAN

2010-01-20T06:34:00.004+08:00

Guys. found this tribute video in memories of the Rev.
Just wanna share with you all uh:DD

I don’t know how to start this or know where to begin. First I would like to thank all the fans for their support through the passing of Jimmy. It has been comforting to see his fans, our fans, and everyone in general give their support. Jimmy was my best friend, as he was best friends with many other people including the members of Avenged Sevenfold. He was hands down the greatest person I have ever known. I told him I loved him everyday. He demanded your love and was never afraid to give it back. I have walked side by side with Jimmy, everyday, for the last 18 years of my life. I have no memories before Jimmy, and it’s going to be damn hard to move forward without him here. It still doesn’t seem real. He was my best friend, songwriting partner, band mate, confidant, and most importantly, he was my brother. The crazy thing about Jimmy was that everyday was a crazy story. We have told our favorite Jimmy stories for the last 2 weeks and never have we repeated ourselves. This guy was magical. The out pour of art from his soul was unlike the world has ever seen. Unless you spent a day with Jimmy, or 18 years, it’s impossible to explain, so I’m not going to try. He inspired people in different ways. He wasn’t just a drummer, he honestly didn’t care so much for the technical side of drums, cause he could play anything he wanted. He was all about creating beautiful songs, original fills and hopefully touching people with his art and mind. He told all of us for years, including his parents, that he knew two things in life. He wanted to be a rockstar, and that he wasn’t going to live past 30 years old. He was right on both accounts, but I know Jimmy, and if he knew how much pain this would cause for the ones he left behind, he would have done anything he could to stick around a little longer. Jimmy gave so much and in the end it was his time to go. All my reasons for wanting him to stay are selfish and I know he is in a better place then this, so in a way I’m joyful that my best friend is now at peace. He made it to the other side first and I can’t wait to hang with him again. I have so much to say but can’t find the words so I will wait until time can allow me to find a way to express myself. As for the rest of us, it has become clear what we need to do. We had just finished writing a record with Jimmy. I can’t promise what the future holds because right now it’s too painful to think about, but we know we need to record and put out this record in honor of Jimmy, for Jimmy. He would call me every night to talk about songs and tell me “this shit is gonna change the world.” I agreed with him, unfortunately I didn’t know it would be on these terms. Please be patient with us for we cannot imagine how hard this is gonna be to get through, we just know we have to do it for his legacy. After that, who knows? But I know Jimmy will help us make that decision when the time comes. I love you Jimmy and I feel like the luckiest man in the world to have known you and spent 18 years of my life with you. Rest in Peace my friend.

M. Shadows

As for me(: God bless Jimmy and his family members uh.. I hope a7x would continues on their great band. Although a drummer of his caliber will be hard to replace..But all the best uhh(:

Thinking of you is easy.. I do it every day. Missing you is the heartache.. that never goes away.

2010-01-20T05:17:00.004+08:00

Konnichiwa everyone:D

Went to 418 and slack today. With James, Rongfu and co. Kind of forget who i was slacking with uh. lmao. Slack for about an hour before heading to 444 course the sky was about to rain and we dont wanna get soaked cause the rain will fly~ in the blk uhh. Hahaas. Hmm.. than stay at 444 till 8plus. than headed back to 444 after the rain stop to meet Justina and Ziling. Rongfu and ziling make a fool out of themself uhh. super funny sia they two. make us laugh till peng:DD
Slacking with them aint that bad afterall(:
play till around 10 than me and james jiu go whitesand fetch Mantou.
They brought smelly durian know! arghh! Hate the sight and smell of it.
can die i tell you!

:DD went downtown to eat that damn thing after that, chitchat and talk nonsense uhh. super fun(: slacked there till bunn need to go home. so we sended her uhh, was walking under a tree near her house. Than we felt raindrops....And heard manymany raindrop coming our way. so we ran! i quickly grab that stupid bunn arms as i was afraid she might fall uhh. she like crazy sia. keep laughing none stop. course she tot those raindrops was from the tree. Bunn! Me and james know very well about all this uhh. we were chased by RAIN before ==" lols!
this is our 3rd time le uhh. After sending her home. we both were soaked afterall. Super cold ==" HAHAHAAS. But it's a fun day yeah. wahahaas.
End of post:DD SEEYA!

You are the sun in my day, the wind in my sky, the waves in my ocean, and the beat in my heart(:

2010-01-19T02:19:00.006+08:00

Heyhey.. To: Someone whom i dont know well(:

You should know who you are after reading what i wrote uh..

Rueben is a nice guy uh.. I readed Angie sms just now.
Saw something i should'nt see? Hmmm.. Rueben is a sweet little cup of tea know?
Try accepting him la dey..Hahaas. Dont wait for someone whom wont come to you.(Kind of referring to myself too ==")
Not worth know? Thats all i can say uh(:
All the best to you:DD

Alright everyone. Aku going crazy le uh.
No one wanna play audi with me:(
She can't play too. Course her sister dont let her download yet? sad-ed uh.
Hahahaas. but nevermind(: Gonna spent the lonely and boring night watching Dramas Series(:

The more i think..the more i weep,
The least i have was memories to keep D:

I look into your eyes, but see nothing there D:

2010-01-18T09:37:00.006+08:00

Had a great time on Saturday uh..My chirstmas wish did came true yeah. lols! thanks to santa? Hahaas. Felt happy but kind of sad at the same time uh.. Maybe it's because everything is different now uh. =X

Your Hair..
They were the first thing
I noticed about you(:
They captured my soul.
Such a cute little korean girl:D
Your smile..
It lights up my Day once again.
I could melt in that smile(:
Just love to see your smile always.

Is that what life is all about?

2010-01-16T07:17:00.005+08:00

Well.. Drank with James and co just now. around 12 midnight?
After that headed to adam house the carpark. had a fun time there.
Chit chatting and so on uh...Dont intend to sleep as i'm afraid i might not be able to wake up to meet wanyi, shawn and her later uh..
Didnt imagine i could actually see her again..
Wondering how will i react later uh. hahaas.
Ermm. hope everything goes on well bah..I guess she assume that i have already given up on her uh..
If thats really the case. Then be it uh..
Arghh! So stress! =X

Everyday I place a smile on my face..
As for tears, there is not a trace anymore..
You ripped me apart. But yet it's true..
Forever and always. I'll still love you:(

Loving you was my favorite mistake(:

2010-01-13T15:57:00.005+08:00

Kind of lazy to post nowadays uh.
Was posting halfway yesterday. Then my Tupid comp suddenly auto shut down.
Making me super piss off! lols. Took some picture with bunn and james yesterday under bunn blk:D

You're my reason to everything.

2010-01-12T03:08:00.005+08:00

Well.. Toss and turn on my bed for 1hour. Can't put myself to sleep over some reason. Hais

I guess this is how Mexico mourn and bid farewell to Jimmy "The REV" uh.

I wanna be your muse. Your reason for writing.

2010-01-11T22:27:00.005+08:00

Homies. My NS letter come le.
Must go check up:(
So fast uh, Only had a few more months to enjoy..
So must treasure it! wahahas..

Check this out!
Kind of cool you know:D
http://www.healthymind.sg/howobservantareyou/

I can't do this anymore
I don't wanna love you no more
The pain is impossible to bare
Everytime I try to get out
Something keeps pulling me back in:(
You've gotten under my skin D:

Look up high above the eagles go(:

2010-01-10T04:32:00.004+08:00

Just came back home from adam Blk Teo and co.
Went to play guitar there(:
Dont intend to post today.
But came in to tell some ppl.
Rev Death was unknown(:
Not because he ate steroids =="
Stupid know! Wahahas.

*Wanting to be your one and only..*
At times you left me cold and lonely..
There still exist the little things..
the lies and deceit.

Takecare all! Tatas:D

2010-01-09T02:10:00.001+08:00

How many words of miss are there in my heart now uh?
Let me count. 1 2 3..........Wow! uncountable!
Know what? I still can't let her off. D: Someone! Please help me!:(

Jimmy Has Fall D:

2010-01-08T01:18:00.010+08:00

Sad-ed siol. Jimmy's from Avenged Sevenfold Pass away on 28Dec09 and i only realize it now after reading from their website D: One of the world's best drummers has fall. You'll be Missed by all your fans and me! =X

R.I.P

Dear God, I pray Jimmy "The Rev" Sullivan is in a little piece of heaven in the afterlife making the angels scream. He siezed the day in bat country then burned it down, his unholy confessions trashed and scattered. We gave him the strength of the world and he gave a us a second heartbeat. He is MIA.. but will walk on through thick and thin to the wicked end. May you be in eternal rest.

Nice one gates(:

Heres the link to some of their song(:

Click to Sevenfold song!!:D

2010-01-05T05:37:00.003+08:00

Cancer girl! Your title belt drop today!
Sleep must close mouth tighttight ok? LOLS!
Gonna sleep now(: nights.

2010-01-04T03:10:00.002+08:00

Wow. 3am le. still not sleeping. Hahahas.
Came back to post pic again. super boring know?! rawrs!

You're constantly on my mind.

2010-01-03T22:36:00.004+08:00

Yeah! finally off day! lols. so tiring. keep working. =="
Went for wedding dinner afew days back again. indian wedding dinner. luckily this time the dinner was much more grand then the other one. lmao!
Came to post afew pic only uh. Was late course ahsiao took a long time to tagg me the pic in facebook. wahahas.

I haven seen you for a while now
I'm missing you all the time!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!:D

2010-01-01T09:00:00.003+08:00

Arghh! Didnt countdown to 2010 this year:(
Was working uh. Thats why didnt post for afew days..
Super tiring man! Everytime went to work at 5pm..Came home at around 3-4 plus in the night, Nonono..Not night. I should say.. Midnight =="
Went to Chalet after work today, haven even eat loh. work for the whole day with hunger! Starving like hell i tell you..Was about to buy mac when i was at the chalet actually uh but something happen to my friends. so had to rush down.had to stop my tummy from gumbering. After the thing then dabao food come home eat siaa..can you imagine how long i ren my hunger?! seems 5pm to 8.30am, AM ok! lols..Shall end here.
Must have a good rest so i can start work looking fresh later. lmao.

My senses leave me deaf and blind,

2009-12-25T19:12:00.004+08:00

Merry Chirstmas to all of you!:D
Went to rueben condo with James and co to celebrate with everyone yesterday.
Was fun uh..But something happen after that, Hahahas. Bunn and Anas was injured uh..Had an accident. Hmmm..See i said Motor was dangerous right?! =X
Wahahas. Luckily none was injured badly(:

Oya! SANTA SANTA! Angie want a toothbrush and toothpaste for chirstmas:D
Do give it to her if you can hear my prayers uh! lols!
And as for me.. must grant my wish ok santa! lols! how childish of me =="
Gotta get going. Seeya everyone!

Happy birthday Bunn and Khalid!!(:

2009-12-23T06:10:00.008+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Attitude girl and Khalid uh!Hope you both had a great time just now with your Friends or family?(:
Try to club less often ok bunn! You're addicted! Lols. HERES SOME SONG BIRTHDAY GIRL AND BOY(:

LOLS! THAT WAS JUST A JOKE UH:D

Ok serious one! rawrs! hahahas

Absence from whom we love is worse than death.

2009-12-21T16:13:00.003+08:00

Tired! Rawrs! Didnt sleep last night again. Lols..How stupid can i be uh =X
Ate lunch with Adam and co at Coffee Express just now..Just came back uh(:
Dont intend to sleep yet. Must ren! Course dont feel like sleeping. Wahahas!
Hey. Gonna share with you guys a Video:D DAMN CUTE I TELL YOU! WATCH!

Eversince you're gone. I felt so helpless.

2009-12-20T18:17:00.001+08:00

Yawn~ Still didnt get to sleep till now.
Gonna play Game with Anas, James and Adam.
Boring sia. We downloading game now. Hais
Aku so tired:(

I'm grateful for the past.

2009-12-20T09:14:00.003+08:00

Morning! Come on Guys! Get up from Your wet dreams! =X Hahahas. Joking(:
9.15AM in the morning.. I woke up so early?? O.O!
Duh..Of course not. Is i didnt turn in to bed yet luhs.. Was using comp all the way seems 5am i think?. Went out to eat with Anas, Adam and James just now at 2am till 5am.
Not tired at all! Hyper uh! Rawrs! Glad that you're fine uh. Stay happy man(:
Guess i will be rotting for the next few hours uh:(
Anyone wanna go Gym? If panda wants. Not Tampines uh. Thanks(:

2009-12-17T09:01:00.002+08:00

Darrel Intro me A song. Called Wish You Were by Kate Voegele.
Not bad uh:D

Meaningful indeed uh Panda. LOLS.

LYRICS
Gone away, are the golden days
They're just a page, in my diary
So here I am, utopian citizen
I'm still convinced, there's no such thing as idealism
Memories they're following me like a shadow now, and I'm dreaming
'Cause I've already suffered the fear of disbelief, Hey...

But I've seen your act and I know all the facts
I'm still in love with who I wish you were, yeah
It ain't hard to see who you are underneath
I'm still in love with who I wish you were
I wish you were here, yeah

I was true, as the sky is blue
But I couldn't soon, say the same for you, no no
So now I find, denial in my eyes
Mesmerized by the picture that's in my mind, now, oh oh
So tell me when I'll finally see your shallow heart, for what it is, yeah
'Cause I don't want to keep on believing in illusions, no no no

'Cause I've seen your act and I know all the facts
I'm still in love with who I wish you were, yeah
It ain't hard to see who you are underneath
I'm still in love with who I wish you were
I wish you were here

Sometimes I can't explain
And I'm so sorry that I can't
I'll try, my conscience may
I'm your true identity
Oh, oh, oh

'Cause I've seen your act and I know all the facts
I'm still in love with who I wish you were, yeah
It ain't hard to see who you are underneath
I'm still in love with who I wish you were
I've seen your act and I know all the facts
I'm still in love with who I wish you were, yeah
It' ain't hard to see who you are underneath
I'm still in love with who I wish you were, now
I wish you were here
ohh, ohh..... I wish you were here, now
ohh.....
I wish you were here
I wish you were here
I wish you were here.
---

Well. I'm missing you again.

2009-12-17T08:10:00.014+08:00

Yo! Yup..I didnt sleep again. Wahahas.
Currently chatting with darrel on msn now.
Going gym later. Waiting for edward to wake up.
As per normal. I'm bored again D:
Play back audi uh. My skills are getting from bad to worst! Rawrs!
Hais. Play audi jiu think back. How i wish Baobao would on9 uh.
But i guess that wont happen anymore. Dont even know how is she now:(
Stop thinking! arghh! Took somE AUDI Pictures(: Lickmytoes is back! LOLS!

In dreams I relived every sacred moment.

2009-12-16T05:59:00.003+08:00

As per normal..Unable to sleep uh.
She should be very happy now bah.
I hope so..Will feel happy for her(:
Only a *little bit* sad bah..
I'm rotting now..Hais.

There was a time when you were all I wanted..
I thought, somehow, you felt the same way too..
I moved heaven and earth to be with you..undaunted,
I said goodbye to everything I knew D:

Unhappiness would be my fate.

2009-12-15T15:07:00.004+08:00

Come on!
Someone kill my boredoms! Rawrs!
Woke up at 9.17am today..Had my shower and breakfast jiu on comp and play facebook le..Nothing much to do today..
Going CC find james and co soon(:

Know what? I feel like sms-ing you.
But i dont have the guts..
I'm afraid you wont want me to sms you..
So stress! Arghh!

2009-12-13T06:47:00.001+08:00

This feeling is unbearable.
Everynight i see you in my dreams which slowly turn to nightmares..
As i watch as you disappear once again..Maybe not everynight la..But most nights!
Oya bunn! remember i tell you i dream about what? becareful the boxers uh! Got Hantu! =X After that dream still got 1 more dream. how i wish that would come true!
But i guess it wont ==" Bunn remember later must meet us uh! Edward also! arghh!!

Sometimes the night is meant to suffer.

2009-12-13T06:21:00.003+08:00

Just came back from 444..
Something bad happen there uh..
Not gonna say it out..Just hope this 2 dumbass know how to think uh..
So bored and sorrow now..Can't stop thinking of You! Keep trying and trying..Super pain..Giving up really aint a best solution you know? It will only kill me! Cause it's really IMPOSSIBLE! Why am i saying all this..Arghh! wake up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok..I'm Awake =="
Let me think of something to do uh..Oya! I know le! L4D2! Wahahas.

Hope you're doing fine right now(:

2009-12-12T05:49:00.005+08:00

Yawn~~ Cannot get to bed again.
Tired but unable to sleep siaa..
Feel like going to a promenade place right now:(
The beach? But alone..So lonely..Better not!=X
Ah du just called me..Talk alot things..He inside camp like no different from outside sia..keep calling me..Hahahas
His sergeant caught him i sure laugh like hell de..Lmao.
Arghhh...Trying my best not to think of ..... le sia.
Cannot wor..So hard! So xinku! So pain! Whenever i try to forget, The words "ERROR" always come into my mind ==" I Miss you like hell man!D:
I know i'm not suppose to say this now uh..Can't help it..Hais.
Currently reading a story book now(:
Very nice.. I'm Not gonna share uh..Wahahas
Lastly before i go, ANYONE HAS JOB TO INTRO PLEASE KEEP ME INFORM UH!
FINDING JOB THAT HAS TWO VANCANCIES(: Actually found le..1 vancancy only..But James also want work..The previous job suddenly no space for 2..Damn that boss! Rawrs!
Shall signout now..Bye!

Your Image will always be kept in my mind.

2009-12-11T02:36:00.007+08:00

Just came back from Townpark uh..
Went there to drink. Cause Ah du going in camp later le..sad-ed sia.
No more drinking partner:(
Ah du! Inside must text me ok! You will be fking missed by all of us!
So dont create trouble and go in DB hor! And dont get sad over her!
You see me now. Never sad le right?:D Hahahas
As long as you know your heart will always be waiting for her can le k? Haha
Brothers For Life!(:
And Bun and Edward. Dont be late tomorrow. Make sure you all come my house!
We Gonna shoot some Ass man! Wahahas.

I wanted it forever D:

2009-12-10T04:32:00.007+08:00

Went to Little India just now. Super smelly i tell you! Rawrs!
Took a train there with James, Rueben, Andrew and Ah siao.
Was heading to a temple uh. Friend had a wedding there..
Super hot sia! And so many black people. lols!
Had a wonderful dinner there too.. Throughout the dinner. Me James and Rueben were laughing all the way.. Its a little secret uh.. LOLS! Whats up with the god of light sia James? Lmao!
Subtitles are everywhere around me now! Arghh! Wahahas.
You guys wont understand what we're trying to say uh:D
Took some Pictures too..Take a look man!(:

LITTLE INDIA!

Rueben,James,Andrew,ME! Ah Lam and his wife(:

AH SIAO EDITED THE PICTURE BELOW =="
ARGHH! Look at my cramp face!D:

Did you hear my heartfelt cries?

2009-12-09T09:30:00.004+08:00

BREAK THE RECORD! ohh well..During this 2days..sleep for only 3hours altogether, To others they might think only 2days only uh..But i'm different ok! i didnt sleep cause of stupid reasons! want to know what? ask my damn brain what it is(: Drank with ah du and uncle john again..with some other ppl too uh..Normally drink after few hours will ok le leh, but today different, till now my head still hurts..zzz
Later gonna go for a wedding dinner. guess i will be drinking again too!:DD
Alright, i'm a little crazy over drinking now..part of my lifestyle uh..Wahahas.

*Once more I'm alone with a dream,*
with no hope.
Tears go down,
Dreams come apart..
Knowing that my life
is going to be meaningless,
not knowing what am I going to end up on.
It's just a matter of time,
for me to know that every dream was Dumb,
it was time to see reality,
which reality sometimes don't let
your dreams go high,
Dreams fly..
But not knowing where they are going to land on!

TO BUNN: Lols..Hello hello. baby kiss you cause andrew asked him too leh. He hesitate for awhile uh!:D I Very honest de. See what jiu say what..Lmao(:

No love keeps my heart, But your love And you .. you are gone!

2009-12-06T16:56:00.004+08:00

Hey..Just woke up from my sleep.
Drank with Jianhua,Andrew,Uncle John and afew other uncle at 444 yesterday.
Slept at 9.30am loh. played with Panda and maverick L4D2 from 6.30am after we came back from 444..Tired sia! But panda wait very long for me to come home and play with him le..Since 1am i think? But something happen while we're sitting in 444.
Uncle john and ppl quarrel. So we try stop uh..Than police came =="
Damn that Fat bitch! And that Thin mother fker =="
I feel so bored now:(
Shall stop here bah..

Kind of curious how are you right now??

2009-12-02T05:16:00.006+08:00

Just finish watching my favourite Drama show..
So bored!:(
Went to play lan with Ah du and co as per normal..
So Wu liao sia..Still not use to this lifestyle..Hais
Btw..Ah du. Stop wrangling about those thing le uh..
You should know what i'm talking about.=X
Anyway..i didnt drink for 2days le wor!
Yesterday cannot sleep you know!
Eh eh..Not cannot sleep..Is take a long time to put myself sleep.
Keep thinking of it........
ARGHHH..Nvm(: I'm happy as long as you're too..Get it!
Who wanna drink later?! contact me uh! Suimasen!:D
Oya..Changing my job soon..Working at pub i guess..
Very unenthusiastic about my previous job..Ahemmm.
Hope the upcoming job would work out well bah..
James will be working too! Miracle right?!
Just pray to god that HE WONT BOMB ME DURING THE INTERVIEW DAY!!

Memories are the best souvenirs..

2009-12-01T02:47:00.006+08:00

Nothing much today..
Went to Elias lanshop again..
With Bunn, Ah du, Ahliang and many others uh..
Bunn told me she come elias also will feel the same way as i did.
Now you know my feeling right! :(
Dont feel like typing much today..Shall end here uh.
How lame of me to come in just to post afew sentence =="

Love is everything it's cracked up to be..Thats why people are so cynical about it..

2009-11-30T15:59:00.005+08:00

Yesterday Was a Chaos uh..
Went sengkang with James and co in the afternoon to meet ppl..
After that cabbed back to pasir ris. Went home to shower and blahblahblah..
Then headed to pasir ris park Silvery Moon to Drink:D
Starting dont have the mood to drink uh..
Cause while cabbing to pasir ris park..
I murdered my Hp:(
It goes like this..when i was opening the cab door.
half my jacket was still outside the door with my hp in it..
I closed the door..then uncle say not tight enough..than i open and close again loh..
This time i close it real hard! And there goes my Hp!:(
2TIMES YOU KNOW! :( Hais.
Was moody all the way..Not because its spoilt.
There are reasons behind it:(
But in the end still drink uh..
All of us drank alot..Most cried you know!
I never! Wahahas!
But was sad..Cause my damn Hp spolit..
Fk that taxi! Now i can't even see what i always did everynight!
Lover! We cannot cry remember?
Hang on ok! Look at me now! Did i cry yesterday? Nope..
Ren! Understand? Anything tell me..or Ah du..
We sure help you de..

Btw! I HATE CHINA MAN! =="

Darkness isn't the absence of light... it's the absence of you.

2009-11-28T17:03:00.006+08:00

Drank too much yesterday..thats why didnt manage to blog when i came back..
Ah liang..i sure win you one day de. wait and see! Who wanna drink tonight?! Call me ok..
Going to find lover soon..so bored staying at home:( keep thinking of you! It's always you that i can't let go off..Hais

**When I miss you..**
sometimes I listen to music
or look at pictures of you..
not to remind me of you
But to make me
feel as if I'm with you..
It makes me forget
the distance and capture you.

Wonder how are you doing right now??

2009-11-27T23:51:00.002+08:00

Currently at Elias Mall lanshop now..
Didnt intend to play uh..So moody coming to this place. Hais..
wonder how long are they gonna play, i want faster leave here!
Think we're gonna drink later. meeting andrew i guess..
Will come back to post when i reach home bah..

You may be out of my sight.. But never out of my mind...

2009-11-27T04:46:00.005+08:00

Went to pasir ris park just now..
Drank alittle..Lover. I remember our promise!
Try going another lanshop k?
I dont want go that place..you should know why uh.
Sorry so Mafan..but seeing that place make me even more shag..
Dont wish to say much right now..Hais

I miss you when
something really good happens..
because you're the one
I want to share it with..
I miss you when
something is troubling me,
because you're the only one
who understands me so well.
I miss you when
I laugh and cry..
because I know that
you're the one who makes
my laughter grow and
my tears disappear.
I miss you all the time..
I missed you the most
when I lie awake at night
and think of all the wonderful times
we spent with each other
for those were some of the
best memorable times of my life.

Missing you so much it hurts!
I hear the creaking
in my heart sometimes..
is that what hurts so much?

I often catch myself constantly wondering how you are,
sitting alone with
my mind set so far..
reminiscing about your smile and voices..
damn this life...
I'm missing you too much! Hais

I'm not supposed to live my life wishing you were there now:(

2009-11-26T15:19:00.003+08:00

Drink! Drank! Drunk! No more! No more!

Not Gonna hurt myself again! Thats a promise to everyone uh...
Thanks for talking.. No matter how far apart you are..You're always stay in my heart..
Dont worry..I remember what you said on the fone..Always!
Maybe forget some uh..But will try to recall(:
Guys! Let move on together! Pei me Walk this lonely path! sob!

If she is the first thing you think of when you wake up,
the only thing you think of
when you're awake,
and the last thing you think of
before you go to bed,
then she is really somebody special(:

God Please forgive my sins! I dont want this type of retribution:(

2009-11-25T10:25:00.010+08:00

Woke up with my head and leg feeling so painful! :(
I knocked on a metal thing real hard yesterday while i was thinking things. And andrew laughed at me ==" My leg i jiu not sure uh..Drank with andrew yesterday. Can't stop drinking..i can't get to sleep if i don't. It hurts deeply thinking that you're not here for me anymore:'(
I was blinded not to hold on tight. Hais. we're not together at all in the first place. but being with you most of the time really brighten up my day.. I'm sorry to say this..But i dont want you to go you know..Life is totally not what it seems like anymore..i go anywhere. everywhere, all you! my mind keep flashing your image every single moment. Hais
I'm begging god for mercy! Please do not treat me like this! It's hurt alot!:(
*To the world you might be one. but to me you are my world!*

2009-11-24T14:31:00.012+08:00

The moment i wake up from my sleep today, i started thinking..was everything a dream??
How i wish it was..but its stated clearly..its not..she gone..not gonna turn back? I guess so..hais
Got no mood to do anything, nothing at all..all i can do was stay aside and hear songs to make me recall the time we spent together..it was wonderful..how i wish i didnt know about this so soon. its just too soon!:( i know crying can't help at all..but i could'nt controll..If that day wasnt gonna come. will you still go back to the past?? hais, why am i saying all this now?! Too late..It's just too late to turn everything back now..

* Will you come back??:'( *

会不会有一点太突然??

Its too late! Everythings gone!

2009-11-24T04:10:00.005+08:00

Everything totally change all of a sudden.
What a letdown you know?
I tried staying cool..but i can't..Things turn out real bad today,
I thought this wont happen ever again. I just put too much hope in it..
TOO MUCH! I lost the battle once again..This time it's worst!
None of my body parts were alive. All dead! Hais.
Just lead on with your life ok? Stay happy.
I will keep my promise to you..
You too Must remember what i told you..
Thanks to those who had comfort me..
It doesnt help much but still..Thanks anyway..

*How i wish i could held on to your hands tightly right now:( *

Me, Bunn, Ah du & Edward(:

2009-11-23T06:27:00.011+08:00

Wahahas! Once Again...The day is Save! Thanks to Edward,Mantou,Andrew And me! Lols! Wake up at 4pm Yesterday..22nd Nov. Hate this date the most! Met up with Mantou and Edward..Headed to Elias to play Lan..I tell you..Elias Mall the Ah neh lanshop very the LJ uh..So stupid the owner..Ahemmm(: Played for 3hrs..7.30 Till 10.30 i guess?? Had fun with both of them uh..Bunn!! Get up! we still need you! Wahahas.. Well..we were playing L4D2 and bunn was like...KEEP DYING MOST OF THE TIME!! And all she could say was..No one wanna save me?? Hahas..Yeah..Great day uh..After playing..Andrew came to fetch us( Thanks bro(: )..and we headed to our next location..Downtown east..He brought Hum for us too! Yummy! hahahas. Sat at Sweethouse and had our wonderful dinner there(: After eating..Went under my blk and slack..Took quite a number of pic uh..SEEEEEE!!!

AH MI TOR FOR! O.O!

8( My face look sucky! =X)

Well..Thats all guys(: seeyou around soon! bye!
>>>>You're Missed Like Before:(<<<<

2009-11-11T16:47:00.002+08:00

Hi Kiddos! Lmao(:
Post man time!
Opps..i mean post blog time:D
Currently Rotting at home right now..
Nobody want entertain me uh...Sad-ed:(
Went out with Max and friends in the night yesterday, Super fun uh!
Unfortunately..Police are looking everywhere for us..
Cause of some dumb mouth..keep shout shout shout! lols.
Dont know where to go later. Continue to stay at home and use comp? or go out to meet friend uh?
Which is better? Let me decide it later bah. Super hungry now..gonna grab something to bite(:

Bye! :D

2009-11-05T23:34:00.002+08:00

Hey Folks!
Look who's back posting!
Nigel Lim of cause! Who else can it be uh(:
Currently working thats why dont have much time for Computer:(
Sad-ed siol..Super tiring you know! Waking up so bloody early! 5am in the morning!
God! If this goes on...Its gonna kill me! Hahahas.
Today rountine was.....

Work up at 5am.
Shower and brush my teeth as per normal =X
Met Zihao as he was also working with me(:
Then went for work~~~blah blah blah........
Ended work headed back home..
Shower and eat..Lastly!
SLEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
FORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
THEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
WHOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
EVENINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG.

Thats all folks(:
Think i better end this now uh..i know its short..but at least i Update ok! wahahas

BYE!

2009-09-18T06:01:00.006+08:00

Boring post time!:D
Ohh well..Every post of mine is boring anyway..xp
And as per normal..most of it is about yesterday..correct?
See! i'm always so clever=="
oya..about yesterday uh..played with amanda jie audi in the afternoon for awhile..around 1-2pm i guess..
After that something cock up..hmm..did i spell the cock i mean correctly??lols!
if it's not right..someone do correct me ok! Hahahas
Audition sucks nowadays you know? And jealousy do kill! Some people should know what i mean uh..around 7plus went down to 418 and played basketball with James,Ziling,Adam,Boon,Sixian and justina..was fun uh..Teo and Ah liang came too..played ball till 10 then went to loyang point cause of some problem caused by andrew?? hahas..but it's not his uh..his friend..we went to help him only..
United right? wahahas.
And i lost all my tard!! Rawrs! must be the police fault..suddenly come then make me run till all my tard drop from my pocket..DAMN YOU! POLICE ARE ALL BUNCH OF IDIOTS! Only know how to scare innocents like me. I pray hard that you all will get your karma soon! XD. Thats all for yesterday uh..cannot talk much about it..if not i will go crazy uh..haha..not gonna sleep too..know why?? cause all my dreams are boring..not boring jiu shi scary le..NIGHTMARES! HAHAHA!
Think i better stop here uh..i'm going crazy!
seeya guys!

2009-09-11T07:05:00.002+08:00

Morning! wow..i woke up so early today..Xp
But...there's nothing for me to do..Just smoke finish my morning cigarette(:
Will be going out today..meet philene they all uh..at night still have to go chalet..It's gonna be a busy day..hahas.
Dumb! Study hard for your N lvl uh..eat your pill if you're ill..stop being so stubborn..you can't fall sick at this time you know! Jy uh!

Gtg......

2009-09-04T09:34:00.002+08:00

Lols? Guys! You all are so naggy=="
Damn lazy to post sia..
Mei..Its His Daily Dairy..not mine..So i post for?? Lols!
Oya..today friday..hope everythings gonna go on smoothly later uh..
Sp and dumbass..both of you are sick!
Better take good care of yourself(:
See my post! so little..so whats the use of posting?xp

2009-08-11T05:20:00.003+08:00

Cannot get to sleep ah!
Just played audi with Greentea and -Kage-legend..lols
Was fun..but, Dont have that dumb xiongbaobao..So wasnt really in the mood uh..
Tonned with damien,zihao and that goddamn fat pig 2days ago:D
Very boring sia..and somemore is i plan to ton de..super guilty lah..Suck it man! Lols.
Ran out of home just now sia..Cause of some reason..but now come back le..gonna leave house early later..zzz

2009-08-08T05:54:00.003+08:00

Back posting(:
Went to downtown today..with Adam,Sixian,Teo,Dom and Philene..
Ate at justacia..then met phebe & Bun jiu went back to 419 to slack..very bored!
cause someone Pangseh me! She know who she is uh(:
I never blame you hor! I was just saying only..hahahas.
Dont come nagging at me ok!
After awhile..James and Wan came,Then headed to 444..
Sixian ah! Number 1 Dosser sia..everywhere also can sleep..lols!(:
After that met andrew and co..Slack awhile jiu come home le..
Hope later will be a better day uh..I hope so..xp